“Somebody didn’t know what they wanted to be when they grew up.” Ouch. After barely introducing myself to a new colleague last week, his comment hit hard. Trust me, I am aware that multiple job changes open the floor for comments, questions, and the occasional roll of the eyes. Moving from workplace to workplace doesn’t happen on a whim. It’s painful. When I look to many of my other friends, I see their long histories with companies or agencies. I can’t help but wonder . . . “what’s wrong with me?”
One of my theories is that in my search for a really great job, where my skills and gifts are going to be valued, I’m living my Plan B. My new colleague’s comment was significantly stinging as it reminded me that when I was little, I wanted to be a wife and mother when I grew up. I can remember playing school with my younger siblings, but in my mind, I wasn’t the teacher. I was the teacher’s helper–the “room mother”. Oh, I had it planned out all right. I was going to be married, live in Statesville, and be a great mom to three kids. I planned to be very active in community activities and in my community of faith. In fact, I planned to play the piano for my community of faith, and teach piano. My life choices have not matched up with what I wanted to be when I grew up–my Plan A. Most of my friends understand their purpose as being mostly related to their family–spending quality time with their children, instilling character and integrity, creating a legacy. As much as I want my two cats, GrayCee and Ginger, to grow and prosper . . . well, let’s get real. My purpose is more peripheral than an immediate family.
As it turns out though, Plan B translates into “Plan ‘B’etter than Plan A”, for me. I’m not married and didn’t have kids, but I have taught lots of people how to play the piano, I’ve enjoyed becoming a pseudo-athlete, and have almost completed a doctorate in educational leadership. Sometime I’m saddened that Plan A didn’t happen–especially the kid part. When I was little, I wanted to be a wife and a mother, but I also wanted to be happy, valuable, respected, and joy-filled. If that’s Plan B, bring it on–even if change is a part of it.
Leave a Reply